Poetry, world observations

Confessions of a Dark Mind: Suicide Prevention Month

I have brothers not of my mother

grew up with a family like no other

with so much love I could smother

but none of that stopped this crime

I still grew up in a mental bind

welcome to the confessions of a dangerous mind

surrounded by people I was lonely

coveted by girls, I felt homely

flirting with death had become homey

I lived life feeling second best

never afforded a moments rest

not if I wanted to ace that next test

I went to college to paint a collage of ill will

self depreciation increased as I grew in skill

every reflection I saw, I only thought kill

graduation got close, and suicidal thoughts came to a head

permeated with rage, I was only seeing red

all roads were leading to me dead

pat of me felt like there was no help, no one to turn to

I felt like someone you could burn through

but that changed when I met the girl with eyes of brown hue

no more panic attacks and pills

just love unfurling and thrills

simply thinking of your kiss gave me chills

For the first time in a long time I felt okay

I had to question was it right to feel that way

often fearing that feeling wouldn’t stay

a weird feeling going from shroud of darkness to the veil of light

its like going from blind to sight

but not everyone gets that same ending to this fight

Many fight alone and fall from grace

leaving loved ones behind as they take a suicidal end to the race

a lot of times because someone told them to “Man up” to their face

many often need help but are afraid to cry out

Someone yelled for me, now I’m going to shout

Seek the healing help you need, this isn’t the final bout!

You are here with us, not alone

you have a place to belong to, you aren’t without a home

if you need help pick up a phone!

I know this world is sick and sadistic

at this point it needs intervention from something mystic

but get the help you need, don’t become a statistic!

 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at 800-273-TALK (8255)

you have people who love you, if you need help call someone and confide in them. each day is a blessing, don’t cut them short!

Love,

LeTavious “Poetic Ice” Hemingway

mental-illness-stigma

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Poetry

5 minutes to slip into Darkness 

5 Minutes to slip into Darkness
It’s now 1:25

I guarantee if you haven’t by now you won’t make it out alive

i’ve done my best

to keep the darkness at rest

but i can’t help but unleash him to have fun

he’ll rip and rend the fabric of reality until it comes undone

as my older brother would say, it’s a murder-death-kill-homicide

but why think so small when it could be a hate crime-assault-genocide

one such as my darkness could bring the human race to extinction’s brink

and when he’s done he’ll just gently wash his hands in the sink

I know you may wonder how words such as these come so easy

you never realized that my nice side just makes me queasy

yup it’s official i switched over

the world has no luck even if you have a silly clover

i’ve tried to deal with the world as an agent of light

now the world will have to deal with me as an agent of fright

now it’s 1:30

Humph, and by the time you read this I hope your soul feels dirty.
this is the result of a bad day……a fall from grace

a desire to take your face

and simply put it in it’s place………. under my timberland.
-Poetic Ice

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Poetry

Candlelight


Up all day just to work all night

Dealing with those fearing. Hurricanes might/

When the sun rises the world is still devoid of light/

It makes it joyous to come home to breakfast by candlelight/

The warmth of the ration intensifies by the flame/

Thanking your loved one by whispering their name/

It’s this flame that makes it worth continuing this game/

This simple gesture of light in the dark is to blame/

As the storm passes and the sun is in sight/

Remember when your whole world was simply candlelight/
-Poetic Ice

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Poetry

The Dragon and The Dame

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The Dragon and The Dame

We know it all too well, The story of the Dragon and the Dame

In which she was confident the beast she would tame

But she fell prey to the monster’s eyes

So lost she couldn’t tell the truth for the lies

It started as a venture to save his life

He bared his fangs, threatened with claws

She took it in stride, analyzing his flaws

This daily battle oddly filled her with relief

Already she was trapped behind the Dragon’s teeth

Becoming victim to love’s bondage

Her pure heart was a willing hostage

She was warned, this was a corrosive gave

Heed them she did not, as she was drunk off his intoxicating flame

A flame that scorched her very soul

Turning to ash in his hands was her role

She loved him & his corruption, loved him to death

A smoldering end was all that was left

Another dame gone, his daft flame had spoken

But this one was one too soon, and left the Dragon broken

He realized too late, you shouldn’t destroy what you love

He was toxic, he made a crow from a dove

He was corrupt, but she didn’t hesitate to save

But his only concern was turning her heart into his slave

Without her the beast felt meager and meek

His toxic heart deliberately grew weak

Scales withered to decay, the end is nigh

Without the healing of the Dame, the Dragon did die

The self-corrosion was abated by the naïve dame

But his own nature killed her and himself all the same

Tale as old as time, this vicious circle never ends

The game will just change players, and begin again

 

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Poetry

Real Life

Lemons are never handed to you by life/
Life smashes them into your eye/
Life awaits your suicidal moment ans hands you the knife/
Throws gasoline on your fire before you can ask why/
Life is combative, it wants you to fight/
But it’s underhanded, and brought a gun to the fight/
Victory is an alluring mistress you rarely see/
It for damn sure is a great cost, never free/
The amount of work you put in can’t be quantified/
After repeated defeats, your soul will feel liquified/
Then life sits back and has a good laugh/
Then employs his menacing staff/
Comprised of misery, rage, and self hate/
With as hard as the work, Being self destructive is fate/
Life is an entity of darkness from the start/
How you deal with it is a matter of heart.

-Poetic Ice

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Poetry

weakness

Weakness has gathered in the heart of thee

Exposing the human being his fragility

It’s not the Human’s fault

The universe is what puts his heart under assault

The quaking sea of our soul can’t settle with ease

Especially when it’s engorged with ripples of disease

Many a mortal have developed a cure

But the deadliest remain elusive and evil at its most pure

It’s the incurable evil that makes man want to break

Especially when it’s a loved one’s life at stake

What makes you feel weak is the inability to invoke change

This leads is what makes us psychotic and deranged

You pull your hair and scream why

Feeling like you will soon die

The truth is, the fertile weakness has birthed fear

Fear that you’ll lose something that to you is dear

Who do you turn to when you are afraid?

What do you do when you are undergoing this raid?

The only thing you can do is steel your mind

Strengthen your resolve and leave that fear behind.

Abandon the fear of not being able to do anything.

No this will not prevent the maladies fate will bring

But you can become a version of strong.

Strong enough to deal with the universe’s wrong

A strength to make you able to speak

Speak loud in protest when the universe has made you weak

The dark dank evil of the universe of the evil created diseases

But it’s the human thing to protest it and not let it do as it pleases

 

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Original Stories

Sacred Swords, a fantasy novel

Here is a snippet from my novel, Sacred Swords. It’s available for purchase now from amazon. You can click on the link to the left of the page that says Sacred Swords for a direct link to amazon if you wanted to give the rest of it a try. I hope you like it!

-Poetic Ice

 

The blood slowly ran from my lip as I stared at Maelstrom with a fierce gaze. I was on bended knee a few feet away from him propping myself up on my sword, Hurricane, but I may as well have been miles away. Maelstrom met my gaze with his, full of bloodlust and jealousy. His hand had a tight grip on his blade, Tsunami. The cursed blade shined brightly in the twilight as he brought it to the Devin’s neck. Her hair lay pinned to her face by the water that was used to trap her. She was exhausted, and injured. Her sword, Soleil was at her feet glowing longing for its owner to pick it up.

“Let her go Maelstrom!” I yelled while trying to catch my breath. Taking on his mini army of water demons had got the best of me, but I’ll never admit it. The Watery vortex that surrounded Devin’s body was growing smaller, increasing the pressure on her body. She yelped in pain and shot him a cross look.

“Damn it, your problem is with me, let her go!” I protested as I managed to rise to my feet and lift my sword. Hurricane started to glow radiantly and wind began to flow around it. It was always a weapon that responded to my emotions.

“You’re wrong. My problem is with both of you!” Maelstrom said finally speaking.

“Take me instead!” I pleaded with a sour taste in my mouth. I hated having to beg, but I cared too much for Devin to let him kill her. He smiled knowing he finally broken me, but that wasn’t enough for him. I knew he wanted to shatter me. He pointed his sword to the ocean, and with a radiant flash the waves crashed against the beach. When the waves receded two more water demons approached me with their swords drawn.

“Take him!” Maelstrom ordered as he brought the blade back to Devin’s neck, breaking the skin slightly. Blood trickled down slowly. She winced but didn’t give him the satisfaction of yelping again.

“Damn you Maelstrom. Leon, please just flee from here!” Devin cried out. I gave a quick glare at her like I would anytime she gave me an order I didn’t like. I quickly raised my blade and charged the demons. They let out a spine chilling hiss like they always do and charged me. The first swung his blade over head with great force. I sidestepped at the last moment and severed his arm with my blade. Its arm evaporated and he lunged at me with his remaining arm. He scrapped the side of my face and the blood poured quickly. I impaled him with Hurricane, sending the blade through his backside. The hilt was stuck in his chest. I lifted him off the ground and turned him towards the other demon who decided to watch. I invoked Hurricanes power and it shot a torrent of wind towards it. He was blasted miles away back to the ocean that spawned him. I brought the blade down with force splitting the demon on it. He evaporated with an angry hiss.

“Damn useless demons!” Maelstrom yelled as he charged me from behind. Before I could react the hilt of his sword hit me in the back of the head. Dazed I fell to my knee again. Blindly I swiped back at him the blade missed, but the fierce wind surrounding the blade gashed his armored chest plate. Blood seeped out over his armor. He cursed and jumped back.

“Enough of this!” he yelled as he pointed his sword at Devin in the trapped vortex. The sword glowed faintly and then the unthinkable happened. The vortex swirled around her entire body engulfing her head as well. It formed a bubble around her as she struggled to get out then it exploded outward. The force blew me backwards onto my back. I quickly gathered myself and rose to my feet but my mouth dropped to the sand. There was just a wet spot where it once stood. Nothing else. She was gone. Only thing remaining was Soleil, with its glow fading away on the ground. Tears flowed uncontrollably from my eyes. At the time I couldn’t tell if it was pure rage or despair that caused them. It didn’t matter, she was gone.

“AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!” was the only sound I could muster from my throat in this state. Maelstrom looked at me smiling in my despair. He even began to laugh at me, the bastard.

“Aww, did I strike a nerve Leon, Sora, Or Sky Warrior, whatever you wish to be called.” he smirked. My gaze on him intensified. The tension in the air was unbearable. This was the power of Hurricane, This was my power.

“HURRICANE!” I yelled as I pointed my blade to the heavens. Maelstrom knew he’d finally provoked me to the breaking point, but he couldn’t stop me no matter how he tried now. He took a step and an intense wind buffeted his body throwing him backwards. Clouds were gathering above me in the sky, swirling at a high velocity. The center of the clouds was over the tip of my blade, the eye of the storm. Maelstrom pointed his blade at the ocean and invoked the ocean to do his bidding. A wave rose and rushed towards me. Instinctively I raised my other hand towards it, and a gust of wind shot out repelling the ocean.

“HOW!?” he yelled confused.

“You brought this on yourself, pushed me entirely too far. YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TAKEN HER FROM ME!” I yelled. In response to my cry the hurricane above me grew in power exponentially. The clouds darkened to a deep black and the winds produced forced the waves away from the shore, sand flew everywhere. Maelstrom tried to run but the wind had him frozen in place. Any direction he tried to move, he met with a wall of wind. He wasn’t going to escape me. I lowered my free arm and a tornado wrapped around my feet lifting me to the sky above the hurricane I formed. I lowered my blade and aimed it at Maelstrom.

“GO!” I yelled and immediately the hurricane, easily a category 5, launched itself at the beach shore directly at him. The windows of all the nearby buildings shattered and the remainder of the pier crumbled as it was blown away. Maelstrom was consumed by the wind, screaming for help as the winds ripped his armor apart and sliced his body rapidly. I willed the hurricane back into the sky to keep the city damage to a minimum and thrust it out over the ocean. I kept the gaze of intense anger until the storm dissipated over the ocean, over a hundred miles away. With Maelstrom gone the anger gave way to despair, and the tornado that carried me dissipated as well. I fell to the shore crashing hard on my back.

The physical pain I felt paled in comparison to the pain in my heart now. Tears streamed down my face and I couldn’t help but sob at the thought of Devin being gone. The sun was fully raised now as the afternoon gave way to the evening. I stared into it trying to find an answer to everything that’s happened so far. My armor was heavy now that my pain had set in. With all threats being gone Hurricane had changed back into a necklace and charm shaped like a blade and was hanging from my neck again. I lay my hand down on the beach sand and it ran across smooth warm metal. I yanked it back instantly not expecting the heat. I looked down and saw Soleil, Devin’s blade, had found its way to me. Or more likely it found its way to its partner blade Hurricane. I picked it up, the heat numbed my hand a little before I got used to it. I looked it over and it started to make me feel better. It was as if it was trying to calm me down. I turned to the sky again and looked at the sun.

“Wait… The sun is still glowing in the sky! Soleil was still intact and in my hand.” I yelled out to myself on the beach. I stood up with Soleil in hand and pointed it towards the sun.

“If Devin, Soleil’s chosen one, the Sun Warrior, was dead, the sword and sun surely would have reacted adversely. SHE’S OUT THERE!” I yelled happily as a boy with a new toy. Soleil began to glow radiantly as if it was happy that I finally realized what was happening. It started to pull me toward the east. It compelled me to go toward Mount Volcanus. It changed itself back to a necklace and hung itself around my neck. I could still feel it compelling me to go to the mountain.

“Wait for me Devin, I’m coming. The Dark One won’t have you long. It’s time to end this!” I proclaimed as I gathered my things and headed east.

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