Recipe: Cream Cheese Dip

This is a recipe taught to me by my wife. It’s for Cream Cheese dip, otherwise known as The Crack in our house. Once we start we can’t stop and we consume loads of it. LOL I hope you enjoy it as much as we did. We have substituted the Jimmy deans sausage for turkey sausage for family members who can’t eat pork. ENJOY!!!

Cream Cheese Dip

Jimmy Dean sausage,  Original

2 packs of cream cheese

1 can of rotel tomatoes, original (or mild)

Your choice of tortilla chip, spoon, or shovel

 

  1. Brown meat in sauce pan or pot, but do not drain off the grease
  2. Add in the blocks of cream cheese, constantly stirring so you don’t burn it as it melts
  3. Drain the water from the tomatoes
  4. Add the tomatoes to the pan and stir in to mix completely
  5. Serve group or be selfish!
  6. Regret nothing!

Damn Butterflies

I’ve been plagued by damn butterflies in my stomach, or anxiety for the last few hours now. I have no reason to be anxious. I can’t stand the feeling, but I do have to admit when I have the feeling some weird uncanny crap happens. Whether it be the Times we’ve been robbed or simply a bad day at work. So I’m really on edge at the moment.

It’s annoying as hell to say the least. Have you been plagued by those Damn Butterflies?

image

Off kilter

Something is a bit off
I am slightly out of my cran-I-um
But I don’t really see the pro-b-lem
But do you I ask?
Tell me what that is
C’mon there is no harm in spea-king
Isn’t control over my choices what you’re see-king
Is it that bad that when you see me you see-king?
Or is it you’re trying to stop your invite to my Carn-I-Val
Cuz you’re a meal for the cerebral Carn-I-vore!
Go ahead and enter there’s so much more
Get over stimulated by my mind
Take it all in and leave blind.
Or just blinded by my cre-a-tivity
I promise you’ll get the full worth of your free admission
For the amount of you that lose sanity I get a commission.
Hahaha I guess something is a bit off
Because I achieve true sat-is-faction from throwing you off!

Things Vet Techs Don’t Like Vol. 6

aggressive-dog_002

It’s the Christmas season guys and gals, so happy holidays first and foremost. Now that the holiday cheer is out of the way, let’s address the apparent month long psychosis that has affected the people in our current society. No I’m not about to go on a political/cultural/racial rant. I’ll stay grounded in the Veterinary world. A world full of mixed nuts.

1.  THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL YOU ARE MUZZLING MY DOG, AND CHOKING HIM TO DEATH!!!!

Okay, do you guys see the picture above. Take a long look at it. Have that image internalized yet? That is what a vet tech sees when there is an extremely aggressive dog in the examination room that doesn’t want to be there.  I call it the death lunge, either you move out of the way or it’s game over. As veterinary professionals we understand the aggressive pet. It’s probably fear aggression. That’s fine. we can take things slow and if necessary a muzzle will need to be used. In extreme cases chemical restraint becomes an option. It’s for the protection of everyone in the room so we can all go home happy and in one piece. When we pull out muzzles because Jack the Ripper has decided to rend our flesh from bone, don’t go ape shit crazy on us because of your dog’s behavior. Either your dog is untrained or has fear issues. either way it wants to kill and we want to live. Yelling at us saying that we are choking or suffocating your dog is just fucking stupid. I’m sorry but you took me there. It’s fucking dumb. Proper restraint does not choke your dog, and a muzzle doesn’t suffocate. DOGS BREATH THROUGH THEIR NOSES LIKE WE DO!!!!! Get the heck outta here with that foolishness! This one notion alone drives Techs insane!

pills

2. Hey Doc, I Need A Refill, I Know I Said I Didn’t Yesterday, But I Do Today. Right Now Actually. No I’m out completely…. for real…..

So, I know I went to public school. It may not have been ivy league status, but my preschool teacher taught me this magical thing called counting. It was a skill that I have used EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. Apparently this skill is a lost art for many of the clients of veterinary clinics. When your pet is on chronic medication you are in the vet office often for monitoring and or refills. Well if you come for a routine monitoring visit and the Vet Tech and DOCTOR ask you do you need a refill of said medication, we are honestly asking you this. This is no trick or game we are trying to play. We figure you know the inventory of medications in your home and know when you need more. I guess we are wrong to think this. If you say that “I have plenty of medication, I don’t need anymore right now doctor” we believe this fact. We’re not the ones medicating your pet you are. Why should we not believe you. So when you call us less than 24 hours later and say you need a refill of said medication and you need it ASAP because if Fluffy doesn’t get it they break out in hives and become a lycanthrope by midnight, we become confused and pissed off. YOU KNEW YOU NEEDED MEDICATION YESTERDAY!!! If you’re in the building we can fill the script, if you call it in most likely there is a policy in place such as give the doctor 24 hours to fill it because the doctor has actual work to do such as see patients, save lives, run a damn hospital, etc. Now you’re irate on the phone and complaining about service when we tried to service your ass yesterday! Well you wait on your damn medication that we will fill, and pray your werewolf doesn’t take too many lives in the process.

(Lycanthrope=Werewolf for people who don’t want to use Google lol)

top-secret

3. Secret Keepers

These are the clients who act like they have something to hide when they make there appointment. They schedule Red for vaccines and get off the phone with a maniacal laugh to themselves. They start rubbing their hands together and in a deep menacing voice proclaim, “I’ll also bring fluffy and Sam along for annuals, and anal glands muahahahahahahahaha!” Or At least that’s what I imagine. All we as veterinary professionals ask is that when you make an appointment, make it for all that you require. It doesn’t hurt our feelings to work. It pisses us off when you add multiple things at the last friggin minute. If you show up for a dental cleaning, don’t add a billion mini mass removals that you are only getting for aesthetic purposes! You know not the wrath of a vet professional scorned, but that is the quickest way to earn it.

Now that’s all, enjoy your holiday, go have fun, and for the love of all that is only keep your pets out of the emergency clinic!

Happy holidays

Poetic ice

Recipe: Peanut Butter Pie

Here’s a simple recipe for a delicious Peanut Butter Pie, for the peanut butter lovers out there.

 

Ingredients

  • 1 8oz package of Cream Cheese
  • 1/2 cup of Peanut Butter
  • 12oz Whipped topping
  • 2 tbsp. of Milk
  • 9 inch Graham Cracker Pie Crust

Directions

  1. Soften cream cheese for 20 seconds in the microwave
  2. in a large bowl, mix together cream cheese and powdered sugar
  3. add peanut butter and milk
  4. mix well
  5. fold in whipped topping until thoroughly combined
  6. pour into pie shell and chill.
  7. eat the deliciousness and attempt to share, but fail to do so because it’s so good!

I hope you like it.